It is now winter - knitting news

We have welcomed the new morning light (behind the clouds of rain) and are thinking of all of the very special people in our lives and the new paths they are taking. In this season of new life, new light, re-newed inspiration I am trying to set new paths for myself. I have spent a great deal of time in the recent past working on my application to school for next fall. My hope is to get it finished by the new year so that I can have a few friends review it for content and grammar.

The past two years I have taken the boys into Kensington Market in Toronto for the Festival of Lights on the Solstice. This year was to be no exception but my body had other plans. I dropped the boys off at Adam's for a play while I doing some last minute shopping and I found myself short of breath, crying uncontrollably and feeling generally overwhelmed. I called Doug to talk to him and the poor guy was trying to calm me down over the phone while working at the same time. (He has been on a shoot at Toyota this week, and last, of the Tundra and it is a LOT of work.) He convinced me to listen to my body and do what feels right. I will continue to feel guilty for abandoning my friend, Christi and her family. They are who we usually attend with and I didn't get to let her know until the time she was expecting us to arrive. I know she understands and that the guilt is mine alone, I feel it anyway though.

While it broke my heart I knew that it would be pushing it to head in the Festival and so when Steph brought the boys home I talked to them about staying in. I needed some home time. These feelings of being overwhelmed are part of what I resent the most about this time of year. I love giving the boys their Yule gifts, waiting for Santa on Christmas and seeing family and friends but I hate the hustle and bustle of the season. Everyone is cranky. People drive like morons. I hear "Peace" and "Joy" preached out of every mouth yet rarely witness it in practice. I don't know. I guess that's a big part of what was bothering me yesterday. I was so sad not to do this very special celebration with my boys. We had a fun celebration at home though and read a story about the Solstice before we ate our special Yule meal. Last night it was tacos, tomatoes, and all things red (including wine). Tonight it is "water" and so it will be all things liquid (again, wine qualifies) and some seafood.

The boys loved their first gifts of the season. Fergus received an electronic lab and is learning about how to create electrical currents. He and Doug and then he and Jennifer were playing at it last night. Given how reluctant he was to turn it off and go to bed at 11:00 I would be surprised if it isn't the first thing he does when he gets up.

Jennifer has been here since Monday and it is SO AMAZING to have her back in town. I KNOW she will be exhausted to the core when she goes home. There is always so much for her to see and do while here and it makes me sad that she gets so little time to just sit. She is leaving on Monday, after dinner, so we get to have her home for a full week this time. For that we are extremely grateful.

Quinn received a Dora sleeping bag and while many would think that that isn't really a gift for a 5 year-old, he would beg to differ. He is still asleep in it as I write. His eyes were as wide as they can possibly get when he opened it last night and that was worth it. Doug asked me a couple of times if I was sure he would like it and I was. I am glad I was right!!

I gave Doug a pizza cutter ( since he broke the handle off our last one and promised to get it replaced -- two years ago) and a gift certificate for a massage. We used to get massages for one another all of the time but we have stopped and I admit that I really miss it.

Doug got me a much needed hair dryer (my last one was so old it was melted in spots) and (the piece de resistance) a set of DENISE interchangeable knitting needles. I am SO happy. I have been looking at them for a long time but couldn't justify the purchase. Now I can knit anything I'd like and work towards knitting half as well as my friends, Suna and Barbara. They are my knitting inspirations. (They inspire me in a lot of ways, actually. They are both very strong womyn who have had crappy things happen in the recent past and yet they seem to always rise above the carp.)

I am part of an incredible online community of womyn and we had our annual gift exchange this week. This community is international and we managed to get ourselves together to make or buy gifts to send around the world. We then set a date on or around the 21st of December and join together in an online chat. We take turns opening our gifts, reporting what we've received, and "talking." This year a few recipients were able to post photos of their gifts too so that gave it a new dimension.

My sender lives in New Zealand and I was the lucky recipient of a shell necklace and some matching earrings. I can wear them while I eat my fair trade chocolate that found it's way into the package. She also sent a tea towel, some postcards, a magnetic notepad for the fridge, and a birthday calender. I was truly spoiled again this year.

I should run. Fergus is just up, a little early for him, and is asking for food. I'll put my mom hat back on and hope that the weather is traditional and seasonal for you wherever you are. This climate crisis has me particularly worried this year. We are supposed to have temps. 5-7 degrees above seasonal here. Take care and stay dry.